I thought secretly to give up wearing a hijab, but I’m afraid to get caught, and I can’t go to school.

Hi, I’m a 17-year-old high school student. I wore a hijab in secondary school with enthusiasm and as a necessity of studying at a religious school. It was mandatory to go to school with ferace and headscarf; otherwise, you couldn’t check into it. I swore not to go to religious vocational high school just to get rid of that ferace, and I didn’t go. They told us things about other high schools that your mouth would remain open if I told you.

My encouragement changed; my ideas progressed in high school, and wearing hijab right now seems cruel to me. My parents divorced; therefore, I’m staying with my grandmother, but I think it’d be more comfortable if it were the other way around because so many people intervene with me.  My aunt and my uncle have the right to comment on me. I thought secretly to give up wearing a hijab, but I’m afraid to get caught, and I can’t go to school. Every day, they rebuked me for I don’t wear a hijab at home. With all the trouble in the world, their problem is my hair. Even though I’ve never said I want to stop wearing a hijab, my grandfather says: “If you’re going to give up wearing a hijab, she’s not going to have a place in this house, and she doesn’t have to study.” I never even mentioned my father, my uncle, my cousins, my aunt. I don’t want to go out to avoid wearing a headscarf. I can’t tolerate anymore; I’m getting crushed day by day. I can’t find my way.

I look forward to your ideas and support.

(Image: Akira Kusaka)

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